yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Terrible idea I love it
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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