that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
