In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
