"it" just moved
I hope mine doesn't look like that
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Randomize
