we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
