she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Randomize
