Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Randomize
