A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
