Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
