apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
