I'm lost and stupid without you.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Randomize
