Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize