brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I want to walk on stilts...naked
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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