there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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