Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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