I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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