I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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