My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
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