at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Randomize
