I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I should be sponsored by Trojan
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
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