Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize
