he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Dear god my vagina.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
