Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
