New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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