so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
