i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
