Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Randomize