I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
