I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I think pants incapable of making pants work
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
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