And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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