the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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