i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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