We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
