i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
