I wannas sexs uuuuu
This is not my ceiling
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Randomize