Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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