Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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