I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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