franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
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