dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
