she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
