Have you finally orgasmed yet?
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
