i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
