Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
This house was built for laser tag.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
