Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
