Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
