somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
