What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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