i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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