My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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